Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast,

It is not proud. It is not rude,

It is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,

It keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails…

A woman once came to me for advice regarding romance. She was in a very repressive relationship with a man she deeply loved. No matter what the consequences or how she felt, she could not let this man go. Ultimately, she knew it was a disastrous situation that had no ability to transform, but she continued to weather the storm. She felt she loved him more deeply than anyone she had ever met. She was a very gifted intuitive and she knew wholeheartedly that he was not going to change. She continually received a resounding bell that said get the hell out, but she proceeded to stay.

There was nothing I could say to convince Susan that she would soon destroy her life if she didn’t gain control of her path and her emotions. She knew this to be true because she could feel and sense it herself. She wondered if it was karmic and if she were doomed to repeat this cycle until the relationship destroyed itself.

Tearfully, she came to see me a second time. I decided to approach things as neutrally as possible and give her an explanation that explained her relationship struggles from a law of physics.

Everything in science can be broken down into a frequency. Every emotion, thing, virus, bacteria has its own particular vibration. Let’s just say an average person’s energy calibrates approximately at 20,000 units of energy per millisecond. Imagine that people are like blinking light bulbs. The energy on the other side is oscillating at millions of units of energy per millisecond. It’s blinking so rapidly in fact that we can’t even see it.

Now, in order to communicate with the higher realms, we must raise our frequencies to connect. Let’s just say when you are meditating or healing, your energy begins to move at ten times the rate of units of energy per millisecond. If you do a lot of work on yourself, you will often reach these higher vibrations. When mediums connect with those who have passed on, often these spirits lower their frequency as the medium increases theirs and they enter the same band of energy. This is where radio communication happens for moments or seconds at a time.

So, let’s say you reach and carry these higher frequencies very easily. Imagine you are connecting deeply with someone who resonates more slowly. This does not imply you are better or he is worse. It is just a law of nature and there’s no judgment. But let’s consider this dynamic for a moment. Energy has to resonate to connect, so what does that mean?

How do you remain in his field while he is operating at 20,000 units of energy per millisecond and you are operating at say 40,000? You will have to decrease your energy and lift his to meet in the middle and connect. We often connect to people through love or through pain. There are always common elements. If you heal the core reason why you connect with someone when it is negative, they will adjust or leave your life. It’s a law of physics.

For example, if you connect with someone primarily because you both enjoy talking about your annoying neighbor, but then one changes their mind, the relationship will shift. Either you will choose someone else to talk about or you will shift together or part ways. You must be in harmony to connect. Even if you are fighting, there is something present in you that resonates with their issue. When you are in a state of non issue, you will stay neutral and use your energy to shift that person upwards or you will step away.

I told Susan to imagine that she had angel wings and that she was flying around while her mate was walking on the ground. I told her she was continually lifting him up, taking him for a gorgeous ride, and then dropping him on his head. I said, “You keep telling him this is how you fly. You flap your wings slowly and you think good thoughts and you take off!” But then to your dismay, he’s down on the ground again. But boy, he sure does love to fly so he begs you again and again for another go and by this time you are EXHAUSTED. You have a big heart, so you keep taking him around again but your voice gets louder and louder, JUST FLAP YOUR WIIINNNGGGS MORON and then you drop him once again on his head. He does not like this at all. He is so over it. He rubs his confused little noggin and yells for another ride. It feels so much better up there, but I don’t know WHAT she is talking about. He’s walking in circles just beside himself and you are furious because you know how darn easy it is. You keep thinking to yourself, “What in the heck is his flipping problem?!” Yes, she smiled, YES!!! I said, “You know what his problem is, I’ll tell ya.” I screamed out, “HE DOESN’T HAVE FRUCKIN WINGS!”

Susan laughed herself out of her chair. She finally got it. It just wasn’t going to work.

People often tell you to make a list of the good and bad qualities of a person you are involved with to determine if the relationship works for you. Honestly, that makes me just go in circles. One pro can completely out weigh a con and then you’re just confused all over again. Ultimately, you have to decide if this relationship elevates or depletes you. You have to decide if you feel ready for this person or if they are ready for the journey you are taking. We don’t have to be similar, but we need to make sure we are connecting through our love and not our pain. Otherwise, we may shift, but the outcome can prove to be more detrimental than healing.

Nothing and no one will ever be perfect. Love is a high frequency and it will come into contact and purge your lower energies like fear, doubt and anger. Your partner will bring these up in you to be cleansed. But if these energies are the foundation for your connection, it will be a living nightmare. Go into your gut and ask yourself if this person makes you a better person. Ask if you both elevate each other to heal your wounds and become stronger. If chaos ensues, know you are connecting through energies that do not serve either one of you. Seek balance. Love yourself more and still love your partner, but love both of you enough to leave them if need be.

Also, know that because of this law of physics, if someone doesn’t call you, it’s because you aren’t connecting. Try to reconnect to yourself and your power to God and often they will come around. If not, then remember Rejection is God’s Protection.